Come on Down!

Like most Americans, The Price is Right was a steady daytime rock during my youth. My game show fandom was likely cornered around that show and USA's reruns of The Gong Show before Cartoon Express. With Chuck Barris not returning to the helm in nearly 20 years, TPIR fueled the fire.

My first real experience with the show was in 1996, when California Gold took a hold of me on the first visit. The show I was to attend was not a CBS production, but it would be taped at the haven for television gold, Television City...


Upon arriving I found out the taping was cancelled. Some bullshitting lead me inside. A friendly guard (when is the last time you read that?) sent me to the stages of The Bold & the Beautiful and TPIR. There it was - the stage, some of the games, the giant wheel. It was the show, with just me on stage. I had always told anyone that it was almost better than attending a taping because I was EVERYWHERE and never lost.

Well, now we're now trying to make game shows happen, and John was nice enough to make the call to have us meet with some of the staff. Similar to Wheel of Fortune, this is another well oiled machine, specifically so they can get right to commercial. However, having never been in the audience for a taping, I was intrigued on how things would go.

We enter through the employee entrance, and John is already lamenting how the truly insane TPIR fans have lead CBS to cut out the perks for the VIPs. "It used to be nice. We could go here, talk with some other folks, have lunch at the commissary. Now, it's this." As we are waiting, we are suddenly surrounded by contestants of the German version of America's Next Top Model. These women are wearing different "costumes" and yet I can immediately tell they are a bit intimidated by this whole thing. They also know little to no English. We refrain from any jokes. A Page (who keeps talking to me like she knows me) herds us upstairs to the studio. I make my first "how did you know my name?" joke while wearing the price tag on my shirt. To me, it never gets old.

Backstage, we are excited to see the CBS "eye" red and white curtains still there. If those could talk...this stage housed Carol Burnett, Match Game, Elvis' TV Debut. It seems agreed that anyone with these in their home should be sent away. After being seated in the second row center (my god, we'll be on screen) some of the worst songs ever recorded begin to play. Screams are heard, and here they come. Who knows how long they've waited, or where they're from (most likely, not here). I turn to John and state the collection of songs played are included in the CD "Wedding Reception From Hell." Right as I say this, "Last Dance" by Donna Summer begins, and before I can groan a large housewife lets out a yell and claps along. This can't start fast enough.

Rich Fields comes out to give his usual statements on what to do. The plastic surgery worked for him - he no longer looks like he's been awake for a week. We take this opportunity to talk about Johnny Olson and Rod Roddy. And just like that the show begins. At the start I'm trying to always smile and clap, playing along in case they show us. Once the bidding begins, I'm just yelling out random numbers. At first I'm chastised for giving out an incorrect amount, and later, we argue on a pricing game. If you have no idea how much surfboards cost, everyone will realize you don't know.

In the end, the brisk taping offers few highlights. Only one pricing game is won. A kid wearing "Seattle Sounders" gear is chosen to come up. Mr. Carey owns a piece of that team, and John and I trade Jack Barry quips. In the showcase showdown, both contestants overbid (the woman next to me predicts this, but I wasn't paying attention to the prizes. The beauties were in some nice outfits). Unlike the Barker days, Drew and the beauties go to center stage and wave. And that's it. I feel for those who actually waited, looking for consistent excitement, and saw this episode. And yet, it also makes me realize how cool this show was when it really was regular folks in the audience. Groups of 20 on family reunions, the truly insane...it all makes me wonder if this show ever gets cancelled, that it will move to the farmers market next door. Sure the prizes will be cheaper, but tourists can still jump up and down while guessing the price of Rice-a-Roni. Yet, the good feelings were also compounded by the reality that its 2009, and the old gold days are long gone.