Long ago, when considering a career (believe it or not), in my search for jobs that seemed like fun I thought I wanted to be a teacher. Specifically a gym teacher. Every time I went into gym, you passed their "office" where 3 teacher desks were crammed in with storage closets with all kinds of equipment and rock n roll blasting all hours of the day. A rotating crew of people would be in there, all constantly laughing about inside jokes (so they seemed, I always seemed to walk by as punchlines like "he should have that bronzed!" lead to gales of laughter). Shit, that looks like a good time. So, one day in a moment of frivolity I asked my 8th grade gym teacher (a world-worn man who let everything slide and also wore one of those gardening hats with flowers on it whenever we went outside, regardless of weather) if it was fun being a gym teacher. His look went quizzical. "Why?" 'Just wondering.' He then seemed to adjust to a pleading stance and said "Get back out there." Was he attempting to give advice?
When I'd meet with my friend who is a high school math teacher, before talk went to either the Dawgs or NBC's 1979 daytime lineup, I'd ask how work was going. The kids all seemed to be able to be handled. Same with the parents, and of course the subject. It was all the OTHER bullshit.
And now, in addition to my current job, I get to simultaneously be an elementary school teacher! I know, its an audience of 1, and I'm in tandem with a real teacher, but the onus is on me and me alone. The first day of school had none of the fanfare but twice the pressure, as the jolly drop off was replaced by a stream of "Wait...ok, can you see me?"
With structure as strong as Jell-o, I'm left to take someone's word for it that the work was done, that it was right, that there are no questions. And maybe that is true. Of course, this person has no discernible taste when it comes to many, MANY topics, so can they be trusted? Do I have the time not to?
'Wait, you have a couple on this page you have to fix.'
"UGHHHHHHHH"
'Do you need me to go over any of this? Does-'
"I KNOW. JUST...can I play on my tablet?"
"Aw, Trip, you didn't do the dishes!"
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Imagine if you told a teacher that, due to some sort of mix up, they were going to see the same student at school in the next hotel room while on vacation. They'd immediately change their plans, or even just stay home. Instead I get this continued joy, no separation.
The day it returns to "normal" which is likely years away, optimistic as I may be, there will be the drop off. (Hell, if I'm allowed: I may be told off blocks away) But in that moment I will look inward and feel the shit monkey off my back...a giant exhale. No, while I may have some sort of knowledge to share in my life, I'm no teacher. And honestly...they were right.
