Monday, July 28, 2008

Good talk, son

You know, I haven't had much of a chance to talk to you man to man, Russ.

Well, I've only been a man a few days, dad.


(chuckles) You're growing up so damn fast. I spent the last 15 years developing newer food additives, I guess I've missed an awful lot. First, I didn't want to take this vacation, but now, I'm glad I did. It's given me chance to spend a lot more time with you and...uh...Audrey.

It's been real fun for me, too, dad. Really. Except for Aunt Edna.

Oh, she doesn't mean to be a pain in the rump. Just the way she is. Let's not let it spoil our fun, huh?

I wont. You know, maybe she'd be a nicer person if she had a family of her own. Instead of always having to glom on to someone else's.

You're a pretty bright little guy. Excuse me...MAN. (sigh) You know what I want to do? When I was your age my dad shared a beer with me and I thought it was the best thing in the world. Yeah, when I was a boy, just about every summer we took a vacation. And, you know, in 18 years we never had fun. BUT, now I have my own family, and well, we're on our own vacation, and you know something, Russ?

What, Dad?

We're gonna have fun. Gonna have fun. Hey! Don't let your mother smell that beer on your breath. She'll take it out on me. WELL, I'd better get a move on if I want to get us out of here by dark.

Good talk, son.

Good talk, Dad.

Monday, June 30, 2008

The Sordid Summer

In the days when The DZA lived out here in Goldville (actually, a few years before that) we once thought back to what seems to be the last time we respectively had fun back in the great white north. And that was a summer that's now 10 years old. A decade is a long time, and a look back will show great disparity to how life is now. But it also shows how far we've come.

For me (as with most) The Golden State was still that goal - the one thing that was in the way of everything else. But you can't come out here unprepared. If you do, you usually end up becoming a lady of the evening or selling socks at an intersection within 3 months. So, part by part you put it together until the Lincoln Continental is ready to roll. That's what this summer did for me. But it's totally incorrect to look at it that clinically, because that's not what it was about in sum.

I came home thinking my summer job would be learning how to work audio at the Twins games. Did I have any real interest in this? Not really. But a couple contacts brought it up casually and it paid. All I can say about it was this - it wasn't at the stadium. It was some faceless production studio in the "warehouse district" where this group did the pre-game show. As a very polite man showed me over and over and over again how to set up the board before you even do anything, I quickly realized I'd never see dollar one from this job. (I wasn't going to be paid until I started working on my own anyway). It was boring as shit. When Mike Max shows up and is also bored, that's all I needed to know.

But hell, it wasn't even the end of May. I went to a party and met two ladies who went to school with me & I'd never met. They lived in St. Paul, which is key for part two. This contact also got me a job interning at KTCA on a public affairs show. NOW we're getting somewhere. You don't know how much work atmosphere can differ until you go to public television. And hey, this place was in an area of the cities where I'd never really been. Not only did that open up interesting dives and people, it was more blitzed nights. Triple Margaritas at 1AM is one way to go through life. And if you don't have much of a care for the world, I suggest it. Those post-show Friday summer nights with them were usually a chase for such excitement.

And even then I needed cash. I eventually ended up as a host in a swanky Bloomington restaurant that no longer exists. Built to service the travelers in to visit Met Stadium, this place decided to stop decorating in 1978. Good for me and them. So the menu hadn't updated in 20 years. Who cares? But my other job that occasionally paid was a trip to no man's land. It was a weekly drive on Mondays to Maple Grove. Monday was wrestling night then, and it was at a man's house where promos were shot for a new minor-league wrestling company. One man, armed with phone numbers of everyone who's anyone, made the deals. Another guy (think Kurt from Boogie Nights) turned his RV into a production truck, with his basement wired. Plug it in, and we go. Some could have laughed at how lowdown this was, but it was also a testament to "against all odds." One of their big summer blowouts was at a county fair somewhere in south east Minnesota. "Would you be able to go?" Where's the keys?

On a Thursday morning I drove the late, lamented Olds Custom Cruiser to wherever the hell this was, about 2 hours south. Right on the river. By 11AM I was helping him set up cameras while others set up the ring. At noon I munched on sandwiches made by gorgeous farm girls who seemed ready to get me into a hayloft and even more ready into trouble with their father's rifle. But I had the whole day to clown around in the ring, talk to animals, and look at the rundown of who won & when. To my surprise, I was going to direct half the matches. News to me...and with zero rehearsal no less. But right as I talked to the camera men (1 of his friends and his two kids) I unknowingly made the mistake of telling jokes just to lighten the mood. (How was I supposed to know he'd hear this feed?) Anyway, as the matches were about to start we noticed there were no turnbuckles. Armed with only duct tape from a farmer and my speed into the ring surrounded by crowd of about 500 (a highlight of the summer) they were secured so that these men could be tossed into the corner. The crowd couldn't figure out the difference.

There were other moments, too. I remember sitting on a roof on July 4th yelling pro-USA statements to confused onlookers on the street. (I can and can't remember how I could be put into such a state to do that.) Throwing bags of chips to beach-goers while Nim Nam Gnam drove the KQRS van with 70's Heart songs blaring. Having the real "Spaulding Smails" call me long distance to ask for my new phone number (the one he just called; life imitating art there). Selling Darneys amidst the mania and madness. Filming Rise, which was as much an excuse to go to my old neighborhood as it was to celebrate Herb Alpert.

We all know when things are hitting. It's even more fun when it's the unexpected. And it was an early-afternoon drive in St. Paul, as the only car on Shepherd Road, listening to J.P. Walk and thinking of the classic film Angels Live in My Town did I realize that it was all happening. The beginning of gold. And it is a long road, and no, it's not easy. But when you see gold in the distance, it's all you need to keep on truckin'.

Monday, May 05, 2008

Run for the Rose Colored Glasses

This past Saturday was picture perfect - sunny and warm, a slight breeze...everything that sends signals to your brain to get outside immediately. But it was Derby Day and the lady had just called from Las Vegas - where are we putting the money? Despite doing research for a living I hadn't even casually viewed the field. There was talk of trifectas and other collections, but we agreed to treat this like roulette and see what happens.

So, I figured I'd view some of the coverage and see what I could learn. Maybe they would mention something that would be such an advantage it could alter our wagers. After an opening written by the intern: "The pageantry...the hats...the mint juleps...the crazy infield..." Tom Hammond was joined by...Billy Bush? What the fuck is going on?! They could have just flashed "FILLING TIME" on the screen and I'd have gotten the drift just as easy. So what else was on for the sports fans? CBS had golf coverage from North Carolina...couldn't figure out what tournament it was, and Jim Nantz was lulling everyone to sleep. Whatever was on ABC was in the middle of a gigantic commercial break. Fox was airing the Baltimore/Anaheim game and Dick Stockton wouldn't let go of what a "beautiful day" it was here in southern California. No shit. Let's get this fucking race going, huh?

I was about to get surly when I saw something labeled "Blue Demon vs. Las Invasoras" - out of Burbank's own KRCA. And, click. It was late 1960s lucha libre wrestling. So, it was nothing like what we know of; more like if AWA put on a "Mexican wrestling" match. Considering my alternatives, I stuck with the film. Not far after the match, an "Invasora" said something to an old guy and a key light with a red gel covered his face. Apparently this rendered him silent. But, before I could figure out where to find this light and send it to Fox Sports, it was race time!

Not surprisingly, my lack of research didn't pay off. the lady called and lamented this as well, but was optimistic for the future gambling. I had already gone outside to seize the outdoors when the phone immediately rang.

"OH MY GOD I JUST WON $1000!"

Research pays off, but sometimes it doesn't. With so much action, the sports book had a raffle for all those who had bet over $20 that day. The first two drawings were for $500, with a grand the big prize. And let's be honest: winning a raffle outside the sports book is a bigger thrill than spending a week on the college baseball match-ups and then getting what you expect. Toss a ticket into a bucket...take this check. That's America, friends. As expected, the lady was difficult for details right afterward...akin to the on the field interview after a kicker made a game winning field goal. Of course, I was asking for real details, unlike Michele "What's going through your mind?" Tayfoa. But in the end she said, knowingly, "so, I'm telling everyone I won a grand on the Kentucky Derby." Your damn right you did. And I can only imagine the die-hards, the lifers in that sports book who saw her win, stared at their ticket that says "Pyro WIN 7-1" and saying to no one in particular, "I ain't had a winner in weeks."

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

Shanty Town

We're back stateside now, the world closing in to a fine point, vultures and dogs all encroaching in the dark. The laziness returns, the inactivity. Like a black hole, sapping us of our motion. And so we plant ourselves, sit and watch the sun move across the sky, the day goes down to another, and we watch as life happens everywhere but here.

But that's not going to fly on The Gold. We're here to open it up and talk about the stink... the rotten of the world exposed for all to see. Let the humanity race forward and over the cliff. Let's start in San Jose.

The Capital is the kind of place that perks you up like either a punch in the face or a nose full of thinner. You're going to move your ass here. Sidewalks are rare, cars stopping to let you cross the street even rarer. An acquaintance mentioned that a necessity to bring when visiting any Latino country is a horn in your pocket, just so you'll be able to honk back at the drivers. Because they're going to let it blare if you stumble into the street. It's a game. Some sort of bean-fueled Frogger where nobody seems to care about the outcome. Sir, have you thought your actions through to a conclusion? Because the best I can see out of this situation is a young child impaled through your windscreen, legs still kicking through the shards. So maybe that's why we're all on buses here. That, or the fact that they're 40 cents.

Filth is everywhere, but that's simply a backdrop. The garbage in the gutters is jarring at first, but then you're used to it. The smell of the place lingers - the bus fumes rattle around your chest for days afterwards. A headache is the least of your worries. The 5 years checked off your life by choosing to take that breath through your mouth and not your nose... that's the concern. The rats scurry and play in the ravine of garbage, the smell festering up in the unmoving water. Everywhere there is energy. The buildings themselves seem to move, as we're all going somewhere. It's a Tuesday afternoon in the middle of the city and it's like Carnival. Does nobody work here? Or is there 10 times the population density in the urban areas? The answer comes as we speed away from town, past crumbling casinos and ill-preserved churches. The financial center is a tight ball, condensed and guarded by men with guns. You have to flash ID to use the ATM. You can't help it, there's nowhere to stop. Keep moving, don't look back, and for god's sake, hold hands. You need to feel something other than desperation.

The mountains are a different matter - all wind and atmosphere - peaking above clouds and above responsibility. You could take flight at this height, literally and figuratively, and if your bus catches the wrong rock around the bend, you might see a free fall. From the top of the ridge you can see Nicaragua, the Pacific, San Jose, and a volcano. You can see the land stretch and slope to its termination, the gentle drop of a thousand kilometers, candy for your 2-D Vision. The wall of green and blue, smoke on some distant hillside, and the wind like a soundtrack. Climb fast, and hold tight to the memories, because like any peak, they wear away. The blowing air rattles the windows and unsettles the mind. Things loosen up in the high air, thinning molecules taking longer to grip, the first stages of the bends. Looking down never felt so lonely.

And then for the beaches, that demonic blue pulling you to its crystal berth, drawing you in with the promise of bathwater and a salty recharge. The sun beams heavy, it falls like a slow curtain, enveloping all. Everything slows down, brain included, the waves even crash in long sounding roars. Catch a good view and you can see forever, or at least as far as you would need to. Get down in it, and you can examine the complexity of it all. How can this earth exist on so many planes? If it's that grand, it can't possibly be that ornate. As a friend might say, this is all too kitschy. The island, the reef, the sun, the surf, the breeze at 80 degrees? That's kitsch. Too much. Stop adding things. It's supposed to be simple.

Darkness washes the beach, a sand-cleanse deep and true. The best walks are the dangerous ones, with the surf crashing in some indeterminate distance and shadows creeping along the jungle. Either monkeys or thieves, and the difference lies strictly in definition. One bites, the other howls. Worry seems so wasteful here, to spend valuable mental energy on thinking about anything bad is the closest we come to sin. We pray to the sun, and we worship in all that it brings.

This world will be gone soon, all worlds go down to the black night, and new worlds are born in the sweet residue. The ever-changing politics and economics dance along with the climate shift. The coral feels as much of a crunch as the GDP, possibly more. The system will continue to feed until it dries up, and then New Ideas will come forward.

Until then, we can laugh. And we can swim. And in amongst it all, we can speak to each other and the world.

My speech is a physical one. My worship is a returning. My life doesn't slow down.

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

North of the Unusual

(Editor's Note: Trip Darvez, California Gold's seemingly sole correspondent, recently spent time in Las Vegas. Ill-prepared and distracted for reasons unknown, he failed to write a story but instead sent notes. These notes were written on a variety of items: a cocktail napkin, reverse side of a bingo chart, and a paper plate (among other things). While we are unable to fit these ramblings into a coherent outline, they are shared nevertheless.)

Stuck here in the departures level when I just arrived...can't say I understand this airport and I never will. Now standing next to me is a large man wearing an eye patch. Casually smoking in his Hawaiian shirt, black pants, and brown loafers, this man is struggling to survey the surroundings. I always wondered where these people are on TV - the real people with eye injuries. "Snake" (because I can't think of another name for him) was eerily silent until 4 girls walked by...each were carrying large trophies. And then he spoke: "Looks like you have a lot to be proud about!" He cleared his throat, and my ride just showed up

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On the casino floor a guy is really upset. I think he's lost everything early...it's only Saturday afternoon and he's yelling into a phone. "It's a credit union. CREDIT UNION! (pause) No, I don't know what the difference is!"

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Just saw someone is asleep in a chair in the bingo room. At least, I HOPE they are asleep. Would anyone notice? Maybe that's an unwritten rule about this?

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We really need to make it clear - a casino will tell you anything you want to hear to get you in. Different story when you arrive. No, the restaurant doesn't have outside seating. Nope, the jazz show was cancelled. No, we're out of the fish special. Yes, our salsa is "homemade."

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Nothing greets a new day like a sportsbook on a weekday morning. These are the lifers...no visiting folks. I kept trying to think of action and completely forgot that baseball began their regular season in MARCH. File that idea under snowout. If we took 15 games out of the schedule, would you even notice? But the die hards are drawn to the ponies. As I cash Potsy's tickets, each begins their bet with "Yeah, lemme have..."

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There's times, hard times, and then there's the Asuza AM/PM. Could you ever imagine a Jack in the Box a safe haven? Point me west, please.

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1416 OVER +10
1420 OVER +10
+$8

(Editor's Note: We are not sure of the significance of the last note, but have included it all the same.)

Wednesday, February 27, 2008

The Academy of Global Golden Awards

I am saying this with complete confidence: things are really fucking good right now. I've said they're good in the past, and maybe it was, but it hasn't been this good in a long time. Checks being cashed, ideas flowing like a poorly made batch of pudding, a wonderful lady who exceeds my expectations at every turn, I couldn't ask for much more. But that didn't stop us from unknowingly attending an award show on Sunday. Actually it was a wake...we were incorrectly dressed for the occasion, but what's new?

I'm not really a red carpet kind of guy - mostly because I don't know where to park. We did some shopping in the mall and then wandered over to the Cafetorium where the prizes were on display. The accountants had wisely turned these statues backward so the already engraved winners' names were not showing. We were peaceful and a little nervous...but for some reason I thought I heard someone converse about college basketball. The lady was willing to indulge me, and I looked out to see who it was. By the time I arrived the convo had ended and I saw Regis Himself talking to someone I didn't initially recognize. And then this legend turned to me and chastised me for NOT CHEERING COME ON YOU SEE WHO'S HERE?! Some sort of usher told me who she was and then it rang a bell: Disnergy. I had a grimace on my face that she noticed. "Some days, it just don't pay to get up." It was my luck she didn't recognize a Barris quote (why would she?) and took it as something else. We disappeared in a barren balcony about 2000 feet away from the action.

Upon returning we kept looking for familiar faces...and didn't see many. At first we chalked that up to new nominees. But we kept looking...

"This is really sad," I said. We were sympathetic to a point, but did get to see some interesting moments.

  • The director fall asleep in the control room. No one else noticed. But I was a tad stunned that the producer of the show was winning the "Dick Ebersol 20th Century Production in the 21st Century" award. Immediately following this excitement we went and ate tasty burgers. It turns out we missed nothing.

  • During the fourth montage we found a bottle of organic wine in a swag basket and enjoyed it...talking about everything and nothing. No one noticed and we also couldn't figure out why regular wine isn't organic, too.

  • While the lady was in the powder room, I briefly thought about how this award show had all gone wrong. Is it all too much or is it not enough? That's a pretty good phrase that doesn't say anything. Few real stars, too much coverage? Remember when there was only 1 TV show that dealt with this? And 1 magazine? And that's was fine?

  • We both think Marion Cotillard should be in a constant stream of films just so we can see her. Or we are willing to adopt her.

Now, the rest of the night was good, into the morning. I was exhausted but willing to play 48 because that's my thing...but dankness hung over my monitoring cell.

"bbbsssszzzzzzwellthisislow....zzzzzbbbnoonewatched."

Look, when Disnergy is out of control, and studios will spend and spend on the "Summer Thrill Ride" and these small divisions keep churning out great films...when no stars show up unless they're nominated...when the directing looks like a police line-up...what? But they want an edgy host! Last time that happened, Chris Rock laid shit down. Haven't seen him back. Last time before that? Letterman, who made fun of everyone. Can't have that. Dave said "Forrest Gump said life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get. Unless you're sitting next to Roger Ebert, where you know you're not going to get anything." You can't make fun of these people, unless they are arrested.

Steve Simpson is 1/4th or so around the world, and as we study his enjoyment the discussions are numerous and many. There IS TV in Hawaii, you know. It exists everywhere and ol Trip could make some scratch here and there. This is talk, it is early, but this happens when the only one left who needs some proof is yourself.

Tuesday, January 01, 2008

No hesitations. No tears & no hearts breaking. No remorse.

Throughout our travels and forced living quarters, it's much too easy to force a comparison to other cities and other people. For myself, I first recall this going on during a battle of the bands in Key West. The winner received a brick of gold. You can imagine the frivolity in which the competition included. And once it was obvious even to the tone deaf who the winner would be, those not in first had to somehow salvage their pride. So, the old large sows from New York battled those from Nevada or somewhere. That's not the important part. And I wasn't aware of what I was seeing for the first time - people attempting to justify their existence. Something tells me it's a different story at home, where the mostacoli and chicken fried steak sits in a wash basin as Peggy and the kids dive in!

San Juan, Puerto Rico
The vessel was clipping at an unruly pace but there was no going around it - we were late. My friend was in flat denial about this, but the jug of Bacardi that was supposed to last through Wednesday was nearly gone. Normally a man whose senses had been jumbled with the tropical rum would be on my side. However, I was getting the sinking feeling we'd be enemies by nightfall. The early impression of San Juan was chaos. It still hasn't changed. Maybe it was the garbage in the streets. Or it could have been the futile attempts to find a driver to get me out of town. With traffic at a standstill and this trash getting to me, instincts pointed us north. Once the sun went down, however, I immediately regretted the decision. Surveying the surroundings yielded nothing positive at all.

"We've got an option - either we casually walk back to the reef as calmly and quickly as possible." Barry's attempt to clear his throat lead to a coughing fit, so I took this a a signal to give plan "B." "Or, fuck that part, let's go to the other side and charter something."

Like the moron I usually am, I had no idea where we'd go. But he had the cash and as long as he was with me I should be good, right? For the most part, plan B worked...except for a vagabond who threatened to alter everything. There it was: the landing strip within distance when...

"Hey, do you speak English?"

My "what?" was a dead giveaway - Barry shot me a look that was something like "you dumbshit." And then this sod launched into a tale that rivaled yarns I heard in Boston many years ago. Without wanting to relive the horrid experience a second time, rest assured it was all about money. It always is. Before I could even get a word out, Barry belched "Where the fuck do you think you are, Las Vegas?"

He grabbed me by my shirt and off we ran. This dolt kept trying to solicit us - he even added "I'm calling the police!" That might work elsewhere but in a U.S. territory I could give a fuck. The bills were flashed in a hurry but long enough for the pilot to know we meant business. 15 minutes later, after some creative hiding, we were leaving the island where the pilot took the bite of a pastry and turned to me. "Wait - where are we going?"

Saint-Martin, French West Indies
This night flight didn't calm our nerves as it should have. Plus figuring out which side was Dutch and the other French was just as difficult. It came down to what we could do more with our weak fucking dollar. I should have brought the Euros but they served me to happiness at home right now. This wasn't the worst thing, though, as it kept the riff-raff from the island out of our way. But I won't lie - the conversion seemed shady.

Eating our breakfast facing the sea, we realized our waitress had the amazing ability to convert everything to U.S. dollars. "Barry, I'm no fucking math wizard, but I can at least calculate missing checks and money that slut back in the U.S. owes me. So with some authority I-"

His fists slammed on the table.

"Can your ethics. Screw the superlatives. We're getting ripped off. So we're going to keep ordering fucking food and drink and show this girl American Balls." I'd like to take a moment and establish that I only trust my friend in court. Anywhere else is a different story. Hell, ask him to talk about the TV antenna on my roof and why it picked up no Cuban baseball but acted as a high power police signal. Yeah.

Casually, I left the table with everything else I could carry - a pineapple, a flash of rum, 3 hats, and a crudely made harmonica. The rest of the day was spent on a covert attempt to get to the other side and safety. Looking back at this, it was clearly a sign that we should not try to go to Haiti. It's not going to be worth it, I keep telling myself. Why do you have to keep going to those places that are either in the middle of a war or about to have one?

Shit, I'd rather spend my time breaking down this weekend's NFL play-off match-up. But we're not going to be in Tampa until the weekend at the earliest. Lordy me - flashbacks. El Salvador in 1985. That was your Hotel California, Don. They wanted an eye on everyone, and the Embassy was akin to "out of bounds" but my story which was written in near total hiding there lead to my firing. "Get the fuck out of Dodge" was a refrain then, and 20 years later we're saying the same thing. But despite being somewhere else we're still in the "oh shit" belt of the Western Hemisphere. I don't see a crossing of the Continental Divide in my future.

Editor's Note: Trip's writing book was seized by customs. This incomplete writing was all that was saved. Mr. Darvez is fine, currently not accepting collect calls from Flagstaff, Arizona.

Friday, December 21, 2007

To Live and Fly in L.A.

When the cold winds blow, even here in Dealville, the heartiest soul looks abroad to other horizons so that the blood stays thin and the mind expands. Caravans can do wonder for your outlook, so planning is a must. Myself, I've been taking pills for the past two days. Destination Zero is Labadee, Haiti. The further inward we go, the larger my preparation. Which, as you know, is all good talk. It may prove fruitless - as lifeless as most art galleries.

But ay yingo, this is no caravan journey. No private plane, either. Hell, last time we tried that we flew over Mexico, when our "experienced" pilot kept wanting to land because he "knew a guy" who had real abilities. The pilot's inability to be specific was truly frustrating and led to my lack of trust. No, this is going to have to be the hard way. LAfuckinX.

I've seen the good and bad in airports...the gentle breezes of Honolulu, the "one long hallway" of Detroit, one-armed bandits in Las Vegas. But LAX seems to exist in another realm...too big to be updated, but too busy to be completely out of date. My attorney and I used to enjoy moments where we could find a gate area or even a hallway looking exactly the same as in the film Airplane! but more contemporary films will have to do. Modern problems have lead most airports to accommodate the abundance of lines, but not LAX. Two or three people are hired to tell you to stand in a line...doesn't matter what, just get in line. We've got a lot of people...so...what? Nope, not this line, that one.

It's not even that this is a necessary evil, because it's not. But this hambone left the oven under someone else's supervision so here we are. Besides, how many pioneers showed up at the grand canyon and turned to each other to say "Well, the ocean is dry, I guess?"

Knowing these folks if I make it through it will be a small miracle. And miracles...well, that's the way things ought to be. In the new year, reports from the frontline.

Friday, December 14, 2007

Naked Reality

Many people use the expression "it's not worth my time" to denote that certain activities hold lower value than what they consider themselves to be worth. It's not worth it for me to buy used shirts on eBay and try to turn them around for a profit on the street. It's not worth the time for Bill Gates to pick up a hundred dollar bill on the street, because in the time it takes him to pick it up, he has already earned more than that in interest on his fortune. It's not worth it for someone with a high-school degree who has been fired from every job they've ever had to try to make an upward move in society. These things are "knowns", and we all recite this mantra to varying degrees in our lives.

But if something has worth, such as our time, then it must be a commodity. As such, if it has value, meaning it can be compared to other things and either accentuated or diluted, then while certain activities add value to it, others take value away. If you say that something isn't "worth your time", then there has to be a finite, specific sum on what your time is worth. A cut-off. What is your time worth? If it isn't worth a sum of say 10 American dollars an hour, is it worth 15? How about 20? And what if someone came to you and offered you 400 dollars an hour? Now you're doing something that is worth way more than your time. What then?

If that passage of time positively impacts your life, then there has to be a negative side, the part that takes away from your life.

I'm obsessed with the idea of 1 and 0, the idea of being vs. not being. If the color black exists, so must white. If heaven, then hell. You tell me that there exists justice, then there must be an injustice. Imbalance from balance, and all of that.

So I think it's not reaching if I say that being here, in the Land of the White Shadow, takes something away from us, draws something out from our energy, saps us of some undefinable resource. Simply by the act of breathing in this air, looking at this sky, talking to our neighbors, a small part of our enamel is chipped away. And what's beneath? Despair. The hopelessness that rots and breeds, it stinks its way out of the sewers and flows into our brains like poison gas.

And of course it's cyclical, and of course you can't say that one causes another. The Long White Shadow descends and pulls us down into it, and then we accept it and live with it, and then it's allowed to descend further, and so on.

The point of it all is that normally, we don't allow things that cause us pain to continue to cause us pain. If every day I woke up and someone slapped me in the face, I would take the steps to stop the slapping. But if the cold does it? It's tolerated.

Some of us wear it as a badge, stripes on our uniform of bravery. Some complain, but ultimately go back to crock pots. Most deal with it internally, a sort of soul-negotiation, setting arbitrary limits on what is worth what, and constantly keeping it at a distance. A small number flee to tolerable climates, which is really anywhere in America but here.

The reason it is so cold here is because we live in a bowl, mountains to our west and east, the long fingers of rivers snaking south into the flat plains. The air masses slide over the Rockies and come to rest over the Dakotas. Systems last for days, weeks even. There's something in there about temporary permanence, the idea that change will only happen when it's the right time. As progressive as we see ourselves, we tolerate an awful lot of old ways of doing things. It's not born into us, it's drilled. It's pummeled with every storm, every sub-zero snap, every icy morning.

The world is nothing but change, and we, its parts, fear it.

The slow beast moves on, time and value left to the fans of corn dogs, our vast system simply a network of loosely-connected, self-delusional cells. And what do we have to fight for?

Another day, another slap.

Tuesday, December 11, 2007

A New Wave Christmas?

(Editor's Note: With Trip Darvez the sole surviving member of the California Gold team, we present an article from long ago as he prepares his newest entry coming next week. This comes from the L.A. Reader, a since-defunct newspaper)

I don't feel like I'm alone in saying that already this Christmas season seems a lot more positive than the last. Maybe it was just bad timing that had things erupt within the same month, but by New Years, we found ourselves exhausted. It was a summer and fall with great music, culminating with X's fantastic set at the Whisky...and a handful of the crowd was Go-Go's fans. Did this mean there was going to be an actual combined scene? Moreover, did there have to be? The crowds are shifting night from night and I get a knowing happiness as I watch club owners look confused. The "riot" at the Troubadour included, it seemed to be the most physical (and costly) rebellion to the buy-in of new music.

As this was happening we were treated by the touring and expansion of whatever this "new wave" thing is. Seeing the Toasters at the Bla Bla Cafe (yes, we hit the valley) or Split Enz (their performance on Fridays was nothing short of perfection) provided an interesting alternative when it came to the tripe played on most radio stations. These two parallels co-existed in a way that confounded the author. It's happened - an owner booking a new wave and then punk act for the same night, and I'd rather not get into the results. We're not talking those get-togethers in Orange County: you know how that one ended.

But December of 1980 seemed like a boot to the head, from behind and out of nowhere. Darby's suicide, and John's murder...and we all have no energy. The BS report on "punkers" on Channel 5 was the kind of thing that, while good to know they included Chuck's viewpoint, doesn't help matters. How many want to guess the number of fathers of the valley saw that and made calls to the police right away? It's old, it got in the way of the music...it made you not want to go to these shows. Basically, it's what the LAPD wanted.

But now, a year later, some of the clubs have adjusted and fully embraced new wave (even if it means relegating punk a night or two). Missing Persons has completely taken off, even within the past 3-6 months, now headlining the Roxy. Funny how we saw them a year ago at the Topanga Corral in front of 30 others who also "knew." But they deserve everything, even if KROQ playing them to death doesn't hurt. Add to that The Motels and Josie Cotton (among a long list of others) and it's as if one of them in this line-up is usually playing somewhere. Don't think KROQ's DJ's don't know it either...but they have a hand in this and so as I watched two-unnamed complain of the lack of snacks backstage at the Whisky not long ago...well, that's California Gold. I didn't have the heart to remind them that, if someone hadn't dropped off that Missing Persons EP in 1980, who knows where they'd be...the band and the station for that matter.

Not everyone is getting this, but it's just as well. We're not getting the polarizing split from Fear's Christmas song, but when The Waitresses' Christmas song comes on, with equally nutty lyrics, everyone dances for joy. Perhaps that will end up the ultimate appeal of this music, or maybe I'm hanging with the wrong crowd. There's something amazing about both bands, but if you're going to survive in the 80s you'll have to appreciate both for what they are. Simply as a metaphor, of course...plug in Black Flag, Flipper, Sparks...the list is too long.

Anyway, The Fleshtones and Hunt Sales will be at Club Lingerie early next week...with Social Distortion in OC at the Old Vic. Next week - what will happen of the Starwood, and new clubs booking punk bands. Onward!

Monday, October 29, 2007

Clams on the half shell and roller skates

Whether it's an old friend, an old neighborhood, old haunt, or even old lady, times can make changes beyond things you've ever expected. When it comes to the diamond in the desert, it's funny how people's expectations on a trip depend so heavily on other people. The stories, the feel of the town is entirely populated on the population itself. Once you're old enough to gamble, they're ALL casinos - just varying degrees of good to swank.

Hitting downtown is a completely different mindset, and it pays (no, literally it does) to know the difference. Over time those of us here in California Gold have noticed this exists almost purely as an "anti-Vegas." We ARE here, aren't we? Well, yes, but this clearly isn't showbiz. The burnt-out light bulbs seem to multiply. The down and out have fallen so far it's almost best to just move on. But the characters - they are the people who make it all worthwhile. You're willing to forgive amenities in the "resorts" if you know your stuff won't be stolen and that you'll see some people that just wouldn't fit anywhere else. Could you imagine someone like "The Message" hitting the sports book at Mandalay Bay? Of course not. That's a $15 cab ride in heavy traffic, and that's money to put on Cleveland's victory.

Upon arrival I was shocked at the actual improvement of one of our haunts. This seems to go completely against the grain...everything was better. Feeling outrageous I had to pass this on - am I seeing right? Get down here RIGHT NOW. And yes, everything was new and wonderful. It was still "downtown," if you will, but a heavy good sign. Other haunts seem downright intimidated by this. One continues to have a gaping hole of carpet where their sports book once stood. (The decor hasn't changed because, well, that costs money) Another removed their sports book entirely for a dance club that looked as awkward as every 7th grade mixer you can remember. Frankly, we took that as an insult directly from the casino. And, apparently, so did the characters of downtown: they were nowhere to be found.

Oh sure, there was "Froggy" with his well worn Chris Carter Vikings jersey (not changing once upon our vacation). And the usual gaggle of annoying tourists in their "Jorts" (look it up) making sure everyone knew who they were cheering for. There was the usual drunks asleep surrounding us as we cheered on Toledo's improbable comeback. But hell, we can find this sort anywhere. Then I realized at that very moment...all of our characters were gone.

Did they seem uncomfortable at this new and improved sports book? Did they take the loss of another sports book too personally? Did the weekend inundation of families from Texarkana looking to dance dance dance wear them out? Are they broke? Worse, are they dead? Sadly, we'll never know. And we sure as shit would never have ASKED them their story back when. You saw all you needed to see. If anything, it was a cautionary tale of a life gone horribly wrong, and the week in and week out attempt to make you think otherwise. Ourselves, we seem to enjoy and support those who just keep on truckin' despite things. They're not out to fool you. They want this superfecta. And if it comes in, well, it was supposed to. That's why you picked it. Now you've got enough for a coffee at 7-11, so the day has started strong.

Perhaps this is a lament, thought of as we dodged the winds and tumbleweed that littered the highway...unaware of the terror that the winds would bring the following day. Perhaps it is a sign. Perhaps we were lucky. Or maybe it was just another trip to LV.

Saturday, September 29, 2007

Cautious Optimism

It was a blustery night here in Burbank as I dared to cross the Golden State Freeway. The phone calls rang after last night's success. But this is not the north side. And I know this, of course, but the surroundings probably did more good than I knew at the time. It was time to celebrate amidst the sports apathy.

Some punk girl who wouldn't know the Cubs logo from Pabst Blue Ribbon gave me a high five. But she was looking for the train, so I took it in stride. And as I've soon found out, most Burbank bars are dead, so my possible excitement was muted by the calmed surroundings. One other person acknowledged the Cubs, but it was almost with a ring of "I know that team!" Sure you do, honey, back to your Coors Light.

As I returned home, I felt happy but no more than usual. And then Ronnie's words from the "landslide" election came into my head. Of course, he fucking knew he had it. But you don't really know...so you're optimistic. The north side hasn't won anything but they have the chance to do so. I told Steve Simpson, someone who curiously had much joy writing about Cubs losses in the past, that the team would only succeed assbackwards. If they blow out anyone in the playoffs, I shall be more surprised than the fact they're here in the first place. They're already jinxed. They're already bad. We all know this (despite others reminding me anyway). So that's the expectation. But if it's otherwise...the sports world will truly turn from its head to its ass. Baseball and its scribes will never be the same.

So, 1 month from now, if you see the overfed folks nervously rushing around the supermarket stocking up on gravy, Velveeta and Ranch dressing, just remember: they're not preparing for Thanksgiving. Their life will be anew, and they'll have no idea what the next day will bring.

Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Yep, we're gonna have a good time


Yep, this is real livin', ain't it? I told you ladies that we're gonna have a good time tonight. Pass me another Lone Star. (gulp) Yep. Say, uh, I think I've got some of those Fritos in the van. Have I showed you ladies the inside of the van? OK, just making sure. That's somethin', huh? Took me a while to get some of that carpet on the side but it's there. Pretty soon I'll be expanding the dash to get FM radio, too.

Funny you say that...but I've never seen Leon Russell. Everyone says I look like him, though. Hell, maybe he looks like ME! Haha! Yep. Can you see if the Rangers game is on? Oh yeah, they're playing tonight. Well, fuck it. We'll be busy then. This Bar-B-Q is going to be big time. Hope you girls like pork...I've got a good rub.

Huh? Yeah, there will be corn and stuff, too. I think Mary Anne is bringing some salad stuff or something. Maybe beans. You girls cook this stuff at your apartment? Haha. I bet. Any of you want another Lone Star? No, well, don't mind if I do. (gulp) Yep. So, Debbie, you and Pam been friends a long time? That's good. Hell, nothing like old friends around. At this Bar-B-Q, you're gonna meet Stan, he's one of my oldest friends. Shit, when we were kids we'd go up to Gunnar's Pass and catch bullfrogs all day. Scare the hell out my ma! Haha! Come on, it's a good joke. She was laughing by the end. You girls gotta loosen up. Y'all want another Lone Star? No? Come on, those've gotta be warm now. Here you go. Oh, I got the bottle opener, but, hold on. Yeah, I think it'll be in cans when Stan shows up.

Hey Stan! How the hell are you, son of a bitch! Hahaha! And Mary Anne, lookin' good again. I'd like y'all to meet Debbie and Pam. Yeah, they live down the street. Met them at a block party. Doesn't Pam look like Rhoda? That TV show? See! I told you. Hey, let me get you two a beer. Huh? Oh, you got the Styrofoam cooler. Didn't see that. Well shit, toss me a cold one. Debbie? Pam? Oh yeah, just got you those. Well, we fire up the coals?

This grilled corn is great. What'd y'all think of the pork? Yeah? Hell, it's no problem. Glad to do it for such good friends. And hey, Debbie, Pam, I can make this for you anytime. I can grill other stuff, too! Shit, that reminds me, Stan, you remember when we had to go into Dallas cause Fred was trading crops and he...HAHA! Oh, you girls should have seen it. In fact, we were on KVIL. Did you hear us? Yeah...it was in March. Oh man, I gotta get another beer. Stan, I'll get you one. Ladies? You sure?

Oh man...you girls...you girls are great. I mean...I'm glad you came. Hey, you don't gotta go now. I can take you back in the van. Shit, I'm fine. No, you guys get in the back. I'll take you home. I mean...I'll be in there in a second, just gotta go in the woods for a sec.

There, feelin' good now. Shit, got the belts on and everything, you are ready to go? OK...yep. Well, we gotta do this again soon. I love seein' both of you. And you gotta know it's good for me to be seen with such pretty girls. Come here, girls. Wait, come on now. Well...ah right. I just wanna say...lemme say something. You girls are beautiful. Ok. All right, see ya!

Yep.

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Give Away My Sweet Sensation

Two peoples, two times, a collision course of constant repetition, a never-ceasing compromise and battle. The Old, representative and symbolic, full of content, stories stitching everyone together. The New, progress and devotion, power and the light, goals, forward, innovation pushing down the limits of Human Expanse. Never before have these two been so perfectly wed, so minutely connected, so intertwined, as to bring about a culture with equal parts respect, wisdom, and potential.

Boston, you ARE world class.

At least according to our guide, Major Groovy, that is. The most fascinating article of life in this amazing area is its uncanny ability to fit history and progress together into a method that defines as much as it predicts. This method, this time-stretched zeitgeist, it governs and pushes, hanging from brownstones and glass monoliths like an invisible banner, pouring through the street intersections, bleeding into the rivers and marrow of the people.

How do they do it? Such a phenomenal sense of tradition and old-world mannerisms, mixed with perhaps the most progressive system in the country? New York, I'm sorry but you don't have universal health care do you? Plenty of progress in the midwest, but the U of M wasn't established 400 years ago, was it?

There was once a time when the Greeks ruled the world, and their system was thought infallible and divine. Their gods allowed their society to wane, and with their downfall, the gods lost their names, their power. They were replaced by their Roman counterparts, and so it happened that Jupiter never conquered Zeus, he just replaced him. The old ways sunk, but their essence reigned. The history coated thought like a varnish - invisible but protecting. A layer immeasurably small, impossibly broad.

We see that everywhere. The gods of our forebearers, souls wandering the hundreds-year-old graveyards, beckoning knowledge-seekers. History alive, mashed between towering skyscrapers. Universities dedicated simultaneously to preserving the delicate traditions and expanding the Known World.

There's something holy in this quest, something divine about this connection to past and future, some sort of bright sliver to be wedged between the two. I'm not sure I'm tapped into it - I have after all only spent a handful of days here. But where there's an energy like this, great things spring forth. Where the city has such a fascinating personality, gold sneaks from the corners. It's a nice place to visit, and I sure would want to live there.

The roads snake in and out, up and around, veins feeding the soul and ghosts, a truly immortal being, history acting like blood, progress providing breath. The old ways never discarded, the new ways always tempered with optimism.

How they do it, only the righteous can know.

Thursday, July 26, 2007

The other Rose City

(Editor's Note: Trip Darvez was sent on assignment in Portland to cover the "Rose City Speedboat Races" over the past weekend. He returned days late, and left only a well-worn Mead notebook. We believe these stories to be from this assignment.)

Day 1 - "Dude, did you see that?"

I sure did, man. How could I not?

My arrival in Rip City began with a familiar face. Greg Oden's mug stared from a billboard that would cover most buildings. So this city is "back," huh? It's safe to guess the old pro isn't supposed to really do that. Hell, who could?

Checking in to an older hotel downtown may have been a mistake, but it's not right now. A wedding reception is taking place in the lobby. Not in an adjacent ballroom, right in the fucking lobby. Hey, uh, am I in the right place? Confusion reigns: the pills I took have likely worn off but they did NOT go down easy. I can't pretend I'm here for the wedding in this Magnum, P.I. T-Shirt (you could at my wedding). But I get in, ready to put a deeply delayed flight behind me. I start at Cassidy's.

At least that's what I think it is, and what it's supposed to be, People are working but there are no customers. An Abbott & Costello routine with the bartenderess...but I get served and fed. And those pills decided to rear back to force my mind's haze to return, they sure did. Cold water on the face didn't work. Am I still hungry or did I over-eat? This is a problem only I seem to have. Well, which is it? Whichever it is, the dry heaves are telling me I need something. This girl is actually about to suggest I go home with her and hang with she and her husband. 3-ways aren't the solution. So, back to the room for rest and recuperation.

My time in bed is fraught with confusion. What the fuck happened? I have speedboat races to cover tomorrow; I need good health. Bruce Campbell is on my TV and he's being served a beer while ordering more. Somehow he's attempting to send me a message, which is "Get up and drink. You will feel better almost immediately."

Choosing a dive bar is no easy task in this town. Coming from an area where DZA and I can talk of all dives we know in LA in a 3 minute convo, a choice is a welcome difference. Scooter's is where I settle because the bartender is Irish. And by that I mean "she arrived from Dublin on Monday." Mean drink is poured as she plays The Clash & Blondie on the stereo. And just as I'm starting to think this bar is made for me, one of Portland's "middle" sits next to me. An attempt for a free drink from Ms. Ireland yields no results. But somehow he finds the $3.00 he "forgot [he] had" and gets Well vodka on ice. And just as his "luck" visits him, he nearly spills the entire drink on me. His last moment save and freeze hears him say the quote above. I agree, and realize it's the right time to avoid the future at all costs.

Day 2 - "I've been 32 before. I was, once."

The race organizer said possible lightning is delaying the race by 1 hour. So, I wander to a gigantic book store and look for info on Speedboats. I want to seem in my element to keep the free drinks coming. While there a familiar scent stings my nostrils. The mixture of tired cement floors, worn wood, and years of sweat give this a very collegiate feel. It's not that I miss this vibe but that I missed it. And this "middle" of which I spoke, they clog the aisles in this place. This is seeming to be an inordinately large culture of ongoing grad school. Year after year, they study...with no end in sight...with goals set so long ago, you don't bother to wonder why.

Shit, that was depressing. Getting back on topic, a topless girl has just gone by on a jet ski, and unless I have severely underestimated this town, the race is on. 3 at a time, they come gamely down. Almost all of the boats are white, sans numerals...which is continuing to make this tough. A supposedly lost small boat is mixed in this shuffle and nearly clipped by the front runner in heat 6. An incident such as that would have really excited me but it all seems perfectly normal, if usual. A "tow boat" just went by us and we're in some delay, awaiting the news.

After a continued spell of waiting, the derelicts at Scooter's told me some very unfortunate news: what I was watching was the finals. The actual full race was done at another location. Safe to say I'm fucked when it comes to this story. Bar patrons aren't ever in the mood to talk of why you're depressed, they're looking for reasons to celebrate. It's one patron's birthday, which lead to today's quote from the man next to him. The birthday boy is off to a girl he knows who's "an easy fuck" so we wish him well. I've got to get the fuck out of this bar.

Day 3 - "That means the weekend, so I work then and I've got it made."

Climbing along the Columbia River the following day, I am determined to put the previous day's sorrows behind me and see if I'm still on for the assignment in Albuquerque. It was a rare moment of quiet that made me reflect on the people in this area. This city churns with its own personality...its own beat...and a tolerance to accept this to match. But there's a fine line between that and laziness. From a distance these two probably seem like the same thing, but they aren't. Because while these people may seem "unusual" or "quirky" to the "Olive Garden or Chili's?" crowd, they are doing their own thing. It's their own speed, and their own way, but they're doing it. The tubby lounger wouldn't fit here any more than he would in Dealville...you still have to give some sort of effort toward life. And bless these people for doing it their way. And for voting on no sales tax. And making the train free in city limits. The above quote is someone who might not be making it, might be struggling more than he has to, but his outlook is so positive, I'm not about to say anything. Here's to $3.50 beers. Back to Goldtown.

(Editor's Note: All that follows this writing is a note (apparently to someone near him) about how Alaska Airlines has free booze on flights.)

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Hey Sid, Where'd You Put Your Candy?

Sometimes you can learn a great many life lessons from the most unlikely sources. Normally when I see crazy old people, I either exercise my Avoid-Like-the-Plague maneuver or I engage the enemy, face on. It really depends on the situation I’m faced with. On this day, we chose to engage the enemy.

There are few things more depressing than seeing an old man clearly locked into battle with the almighty Alzheimer Beast. They’re not sure which was is up, where they are, or who’s on first – let alone how to open a stubborn box of candy. You could see in his eyes that he was disappointed in his inability to complete a task that, a mere decade ago, was as easy as breathing – is he a smoker? I don’t know. But watching him finally tear ungraciously into those Raisinettes taught me that I should never give up – even when I can’t keep my diapers clean.

Of course as he snacked on his tasty treat, the look in his eyes did no belay the satisfaction of just accomplishing what was obviously a difficult task. Could it be that he’s already forgotten the incredible journey he just taken in getting to his treasures? Of is the lack of satisfaction due to his belief that life is not a destination, it is a journey? Is it possible that it’s not the candy he’s dissatisfied with but instead he’s sad that the journey itself has ended? Possibly. Or he simply fell into his own mind.

At some point he decided that he’d had enough of whatever it was he was doing, got up, and left. Oh well, so our operation didn’t work out. But wait, what’s this? He’s forgotten his Holy Grail!! Luck to us! But has he simply forgotten his precious treats, or has he discarded them? Could it be that his trash is our treasure!? Either way, those fucking chocolate covered raisins are ours. Finders keepers, losers weepers, bitch!

As onlookers gaped at our find we finally realized what it was like to reach the summit – to be atop the world, looking down on all the chocolate-covered-raisin-less paupers. Another lesson learned! It’s good to be king.

It truly is amazing how many lessons can be learned – and who they’re learned from. In on 4 hour period we learned enough lessons to take us into the next stages of our lives. We’ve evolved into better, more well rounded, people who can now pass on those lesson to others. Of course, this would be incomplete if we didn’t pass on the last lesson learned from this experience; All good things must come to an end.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

By city or mountain

That's right, it is called the road less travelled because it isn't used as much. And there's the other road, the one I've been down before. It was paved once and there it sat nearly five years ago, littered with potholes. And a year later it was repaved and there was the long road to recovery.

We know why it was closed. This long road seemed to be repaved with the best intentions, as they always are. Hell, maybe that was the point of it, looking back, that this journey was so long and voluminous that it would trump everything. Contradictions...eh, it will work out.

But it didn't, for a single reason not needed to be rehashed. For a time later I would hear your car, stuck in the on-ramp of this road. There I was, on the side, stunned you were there. Half surprised and half annoyed. The personality wavered. I was expected to fix this...to open the road to at least one lane so that it may be travelled again. We both knew better, though.

Much time was passing, and I was on a different road. Occasionally, I'd hear you were thinking of taking the old road again...I'd wander over and see your going the other way, taillights igniting my brain. The closing of our road was simply reinforced, and I'd wander back again. I hadn't given it much thought.

So one June night, I sit watching a 1974 Tonight Show episode and hear a car horn. Your car horn. You are broken down. You've called me - me - to fix this. I am without any proper tools...more stunned that you even showed up here to grow genuine concern. But I know this road as good as you, so I knew you'd need to be repaired before you go anywhere else. But why me? Was I the last repairman in your mind? I don't know that I'd fix everything in the finest manner. But I did. I was overly thanked and I was told you drive by again the next night.

When you did, it was much too late. "Let's work on it tomorrow, or anytime on the weekend." Well, this situation has occurred twice. I am told to bring tools to fix you, or more importantly, to fix this road...overgrown with weeds, broken promises, meandering off ramps. And yet each service call is a reminder of why this road is why it is: I can't say it's my job to care...it's not work, but I'd damn well rather look for a new road than sit by this call box and wait for a call that's supposed to come but never does. Again, and again.

It is useless to the both of us to say "end of the road." The road ended. I was at the end of it. And knowing you, you'll drive by again...see the end and wonder why. Not why you're there, but why you're there again. For your sake, you'd better hope I'm there next time you arrive. Don't forget the service contract you chose that read "no guarantees." Until then, wander I will.

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Everything Works if you let it

Part of the search for gold here in California comes with the territory. You know what mines have been picked...and you know what's fool's gold:

"Yeah, they're original episodes of Soul Train and everything, back from the '70s!"
Hmmm...why are there Japanese characters all over the screen?

"It's a cozy 1 bedroom...there's parking, it's not a busy street so it's not had to find a spot."
Who builds a place in Los Angeles withOUT parking?

For months, I have searched for new video swank, a new place to live, and the continued search for the drink. Vacancies would taunt me...collectors would have nothing new to trade but would love a copy of my stuff...I was buying drink at an alarming rate. And just 1 week ago, I was fearing the sad realization: this search will last into the dankness that is the summer, all of this during the time I'd rather be in a customized van, driving through the canyons to Malibu while Suburban Lawns plays on the stereo. That's what I have planned. Fuck, I'd even settle for a compact car and REO Speedwagon as long as we're on the right track. But depression got a hold on me and I feared having to step everything up: living search, new videos, more beer. But then everything turned right.

There's a new place with all new shit. There's new video gold from vaults that aren't to be opened. And...yeah, I still have to buy more drink. But this weekend, my last in a certain decade, I let it be Lowenbrau. It's all happening.

Oh yeah, summertime in southern California? I believe "swank" is the usual response.

Monday, May 07, 2007

Kind Hearts Don't Make A New Story, Kind Hearts Don't Grab Any Glory

It's all coming together out here, everything swirling around, mixing and settling with sufficient pleasure, until the proper complexity is achieved. It sits until it needs to, and then it's magic time. Poured with care, extension of life, the ancient drink, sweet fruit turned sweeter. The head can cool off in this breeze, the brain bubbles sinking back to the bottom, to be downed with a final gulp, wonderful release.

Night time in Santa Barbara, and everyone's got something to get on about. The region is foreign to me, a mass of culture that is too intricate for my eyes, especially from where I've just come. The universe here speeds up, molecules bumping into each other at faster speeds, a closed system. Up north, things were easier.

Fuck, and tonight we'll be back in Inglewood.

The Santa Ynez Valley is a sight to behold for sure, but don't look too long or you'll learn too much. The thing here is the feel, the air that is circulating, the pulse. It's all slower, but that's too singular. This isn't Altoona, WI. It's slower, but with a purpose. Bill Hicks once said that smoking pot didn't make you lazy, it just opened your eyes to the utter uselessness of most of the activities in your life. That's what this place is like. A natural tonic, a blood re-organizer. We'll slow it right down, base it out, and we'll discover gold. Deep beneath the soil of this region is the soul, breathing out a fantastic blend of crops and atmosphere. The outward weather working in unison with the thirsty earth, it's a dance, a great stimulator. Is this how the ancient Greeks thought about it?

And so we'll float through these villas, oblivious to life outside of this place, the head on low vibration. We'll let all of the hangups melt away, all of the connections fuzz and fray, the rivers of streets will guide us, the signs will nudge us. We'll catch the sediment, and let it drift to the bottom of the glass, holding it up to examine, witnessing the slow settling with admiration.

After all, that's what happens when you add gold to water.