So you want to bowl 5 games in 2 hours

Interesting choice.  If you make that decision, here is the outcome:

Friday, 6:15PM
On the drive home, you notice your left knee is sore, but it is brushed off due to it being the end of the work week.  It's also been a week of driving, and long periods in the car are not to your (or anyone's) benefit.

Friday, 9:45PM (approximate)
Sitting inside a movie theater, you see James Bond being told he's missed a step.  You sympathize with 007, but you feel a jolt of energy in your legs.  I bet you could bowl another 5 games!  Such exercise is needed, or something...hey, how old is this carpet in here?

Saturday, 10:12AM
You're awake: no problem there.  It's when you roll out of bed - it appears that "lumbering" will be your method of transportation today.  Each step is deliberate.  You attempt to keep your normal pace, but your lady can tell something is up.  A hearty breakfast makes you realize, while eating, that your wrist doesn't hurt.  That's because when it comes to the roll, you know what you're doing.

Saturday, 11:26AM
Well, that "nice, long shower" felt comfortable but did nothing for your condition.  Keep fighting it.  Walk it off.  Going up and down the stairs multiple times makes you wonder how it occurs without effort on a daily basis.  Someone asked if you "stretched" but isn't that like asking a drunk "Did you pace yourself?"

Saturday, 6:12PM
When crossing Wilshire Blvd. along Beverly Drive, you're given roughly 30 seconds.  This should be no problem at even the most leisurely pace.  Today, however, you pay particular notice to each car turning west.  You'll make it, but...hey - look, someone is walking a dog.  What's going on, pup?

Sunday, 9:52AM
Things seem better at first glance, but movements are still pained.  A memory comes from out of nowhere to your brain: you have finished playing catch with a family friend in your childhood.  You are told that you're lucky: you aren't sore after doing a workout.  But this was no workout - this was a Christmas party with free booze...that is until you saw someone openly cough uncovered on a pitcher of beer.  It was dry from then on.  At least you don't have a cold.

Sunday, 7:23PM
Now we're getting somewhere.  You're on glass 3 of Sangria, people are laughing, and you're sitting on the floor.  Sure, getting up looks like a TV tray trying to walk on its own, but at least it doesn't hurt.  The key is drugs...why haven't you taken those wonderful pills?  If there's a pill that can make you or your surroundings better, why not take it?

Monday, 8:04AM
Shit, why are my shoes so far away?  Seriously, where are those pills?  Summoning the ghost of Belushi...help me.

Monday, 12:16PM
How was my weekend?  Oh, it was fantastic.  Had a lot of fun.  Wished it would never end.  Could you hold that door open for an old man?