Jerry Brown, Uber Alles

The man is back, folks. He will be in charge, and perhaps that is as it should be. As a matter of disclosure, I did not vote for the winner, nor the second place guy. Excuse me, woman. My choice placed near the bottom. Some call that throwing your vote away. Or, you could just not vote at all and bitch about politics 24/7 (like people I know...I'm sure you know some, too).

Where was I? Ah, yes. California found out what happens when someone with no experience in running or working in a government whatsoever is placed in charge: shit breaks right and left. Smiling Arnold will now be sent to the Relief Home for Retired Motion Picture Stars in Toluca Lake, CA. He will continue to tan and petrify, awaiting a call from Sly Stallone for a larger part in The Expendables 2.

Jerry's win is a stunner for a lot of reasons. Yes, his experience is something larger than nearly any candidate in any state election. But he didn't run on that. And he didn't try to match Whitman fund for fund. Even during the summer, I asked people "If Jerry is running for Governor, I'd like to know when the campaign started." But he sat quietly, knowing what to do and when. This thrift and smart spending also impressed people out here at a time when not only most people can't hack it, but Arnold has left the state essentially flat broke.

Whitman attempted (when she was shying away from her personal life) to focus on his time in office in the 70s and 80s, and for whatever points she might have made that were on target, she found an interesting response: indifference. 30+ years later doesn't mean a lot to the public, and since Jerry wasn't pimping his past, there was little comparison.

Jerry likely won't need to attempt to manipulate the press as he moves along, though his affable and knowledgeable nature is a unique change from his predecessor. Will he make changes fast? Will he ignore people trying to get in his way? Getting shit in gear is priority #1, and everyone's waiting.

Oddly enough, I spent much of election day in jury duty. Those of us who can form complete sentences and bathe regularly were complaining that we didn't think it would be today...but here we were. As I attempted to relax while I sat in a mildly more comfortable DMV, I started to wonder how this election would work out. And then, a bolt of knowledge hit my brain: Hey! Look around here - this is essentially the electorate. On face value, take a guess on how you think this will work out.

Holy fuck.

This group...yeah, at least a half-dozen are having trouble maintaining brain function. It's a miracle that they even arrived. One man is wearing white long-johns and stone wash overalls. He has a giant beard. We're all wondering how he made it from Needles to Burbank in time.

Minutes after arriving, the woman in charge continues to talk and eventually berate the guy sitting to my left. He is told on 4 different occasions to complete a form. This man might be in charge of someone's judgement. I wince at the notion. After his form was finally completed, the woman in charge now is doing a final roll call for all of those who may serve today. "Please say 'here' aloud, and take one of these ID cards." The first 5 people called do not move until well afterward. The look on this woman's face must be that of a first grade teacher. Yet, all around me, are "adults."

Can you imagine being in a court case? You are either innocent, or the verdict should clearly go your way...and then you look to your right and see 12 mouth breathers. Not a feel-good view, eh? Life never seemed so unbalanced as that moment. The litigants in the lobby were nervous as it was...seeing my fellow jurors had to scare them shitless.

During a break, I went outside to enjoy the 87 degree day (I live in Dealville, and that's how the temps go out here for November). In process of leaving, I saw a policeman spend roughly 10 seconds trying to enter through the exit door of the court. "Did they change it?" he asks his partner. I'm pretty sure that cop, for the record, is not in favor of being paired with a rookie.

Eventually we were released...free to vote and live life. But I couldn't help but wonder what was going through the foggy minds of the other people. Were they thinking about their votes? Were they focused on a specific election? Or were they in a rush because McRib is back?! Well, Jerry, these are the people you get to lead. You've been here before. As you've seen, this group is an easily leadable one...what's first?